La Famiglia!

As I sit down to write this, my day is a frenzy of activity and my mind is a whirl of thoughts.  For we leave tomorrow for Chicago to see my mother, visit the family and attend our annual Paulette Family picnic on Sunday.  Between packing, last minute errands, housecleaning (although I don't know why we clean house when we leave on a trip? :) ) mowing the grass and arranging dog care there's always so much to do.  It is when I mow the lawn, which at one acre in size takes about 90 minutes to do, that I do all my world changing thinking.  I know, scary, right?  How many middle aged men when cutting their grass, run in the house with their surefire greatest ideas to revolutionize the world or solve all of life's problems?  I do.  It hasn't quite worked out yet but there have been some moments of absurd hilarity as I scurry to find pen and paper to write down my "Eureka, this is it!"thoughts.
Anyway, as I was mowing my mind drifted off to past family gatherings and picnics when I was growing up.  There were three dates when summer arrived that were the A-list events of the year, besides Christmas Eve at Uncle Joe's and Aunt Phylis's house and Thanksgiving and Christmas Day with the Messina clan.   These were Memorial Day, July 4th, and Labor Day.  The picnics at West Park in Park Ridge!  An absolute binge fest of food, ice cream, bocce ball, cards, games, swimming and laughter!  The smells of the grills, Italian sausage and peppers, pizza, chicken, burgers and desserts galore.  There were the uncles Chuck, Joe, Dean, Tom, Johnnie and Tony along with my dad, the ringleaders.  My Aunts Marlene, Phylis, Annette, Susie and Angie. Also all my awesome cousins, you know who you are, and at the head of it all, totally in charge, watching benevolently but firmly over her brood, Grandma Paulette.
Now this may sound corny, but we couldn't wait to get there!  It seemed it took forever to load up the station wagon and my mom to go through her checklist of food items but we always made it.  The car would barely be stopped and my sisters and brothers would be barreling out the doors at frantic speeds, swim trunks and towels under our arms, yelling incoherently as we bolted towards the picnic area, only to be stopped dead in our tracks.  "Hey, get back here!" my dad would yell.  We always forgot the baskets, folding table and chairs, lemonade and numerous other items essential to the ultimate picnic experience.  But we didn't care.  It was as if we were on some drug that created absolute euphoria for a day. We turned around grabbed all the gear and raced off to see our cousins.  The rest as they say is a blur!  The laughter was boisterous.  The conversations spirited.  The debates about points in bocce ball were humorously heated by men in fedoras, golf caps, shorts, black socks and sandals, smoking the foulest smelling cigars and drinking Uncle Chuck's homemade red wine from dixie cups!  The aunts all the while off to one side miraculously carrying on a conversation and understanding everything said while both talking and listening at the same time. Truly amazing to see!  We swam at the pool, played numerous games for prizes and ate like it was our last meal.  It was all pure innocent bliss.  Quite simply some of the best memories of my life.  And I owe it all to what made it so great, my family!
In my 51 years, through all the changes of my life, growing up, marriage, moving, starting a family
and working to support them.  Through laughter and tears, hugs and a few blows the one constant blessing the Lord kept reminding me of is to guard my family.  My dad, mom, brothers, sisters, grandparents, uncs and aunts all have played a significant role on who I am today.  It is why I love my wife and children fiercely.  It's why when I have the occasion to see my aunts, uncles and cousins I relish the time and thank them for being there.  I believe with all my heart that a fractured family means fractured individuals with fractured and unhealthy lives.  That once the circle is broken it's hard to put it back together.  We need each other.  The riches of our lives are so often wrapped around our families.  When my dad died this May, although hurting I was thankful right away for such a great family.  We got through our grief together and will go forward together just as God wants us to. I urge you to keep your family together.  Mend the fences that are broken.  Swallow pride, be humble and forgive.  Seek out lost or forsaken loved ones and make it right.  Keep the circle unbroken so when you are gone the bonds are strong! 

Family life is full of major and minor crises -- the ups and downs of health, success and failure in career, marriage, and divorce -- and all kinds of characters. It is tied to places and events and histories. With all of these felt details, life etches itself into memory and personality. It's difficult to imagine anything more nourishing to the soul.
-- Thomas Moor